Teen-Proofing Fostering Responsible Decision Making in Your Teenager (Volume 10)

Finally, someone courageous enough to call out the toxic parenting psychobabble. Unlike other parenting books, Rosemond provides concrete examples and scenarios and suggests how to handle them. Some of the hypothetical dialogue in the book is silly, but I was able to look past that and appreciate the fact that he's not delivering parenting advice in vague, abstract terms. I don't agree with everything he says (like his seemingly casual approach to underage drinking), but I came away feeling unburdened. He assumes, probably correctly, that anyone reading his book cares about their kids. And he assures the reader that, despite your best efforts at parenting, kids are going to make stupid decisions and do stupid things, and guess what? It's not your fault, parents. You cannot control everything your kids do. What's important is how you handle their stupid decisions and make sure they learn from them. My biggest complaint is that this book desperately needs to be updated. This was written before the smartphone and social media, and as you know, the smartphone has completely upended an entire generation and made parenting exponentially difficult. As I was reading, I was trying to imagine how some of the advice in the book would be altered in light of 21st century technology. It's remarkable how much things have changed in 20 years.

I am so glad I read this book!My son decided to turn into a teenager in the matter of a week or so and I saw all of my “parenting” skills go down the drain. As I felt like I didn’t know how to parent a teenager I went to a counselor who suggested this book. I couldn’t put it down and within a few weeks my relationship with my son took a drastic turn for the better.I stopped feeling like I was out of control as a parent and he started gaining the freedom and responsibilities he was craving as a young man.I am very hopeful that with these new tools my husband and I have we will be able to have (for the most part) smooth sailing into adulthood (with the normal hiccups that humans make!)Also for the single parents that co parent, I do believe it would be harder to enforce these standards of responsibility= freedom on your children but coming from a single parent household with a mom who cared and a dad who didn’t, I will tell you personally your child will respect and love you more for trying to instill real world responsibility on them instead of enabling them. Easier said then done but keep fighting the good fight, they will be out of the house before you know it. And once they are adults and parents of there own they will be so grateful that you were there parent above being their friend.

I have love/hate relationship with this book. I love the concept that teens need to have boundaries and that establishing these boundaries early on is as essential as assuring that a two year old will not drink the drano. At some point, and early on, this book seems to suggest that we lay down these boundaries and the sooner we do this act, the better prepared our homes will be for the teen years. I could not agree more. Yet, I disagree with the author's perceptions on the struggles adolescents face. he minimizes the impact ADD and ADHD can have on a home. He brings up many very real problems, such as teen suicide, and defiance. Yet, his way of explaining these problems is connected to child labor laws? He seems t suggest that our kids do not have enough to do with their time, and that the sixties is when this problem of not having enough to do, made it a sort of existential crisis for the teen. I have difficulty grasping that these real conditions and problems are a direct result of lack of purpose and direction that comes from lack of work in factories? That suggestion seems far fetched to me. Although I agree our children need to feel purposeful, perhaps that is a big part of why they feel lost, developmentally its a time to be trying on hats to see who one truly is. The discipline I think provides the stability kids need so that they can still be kids, because they are not ready for the real world. What I did get from his observations and suggestions that children or teens are not finding purposeful work and feel lost, is that connecting their busy schedules to their future,can be very empowering for them. I did do what he said. I laid down the law. I am l glad I did. And since then, I have allowed my child more responsibility to channel and plan what they actually ant out of life. But, its important to not blow off their struggles in the process.

I am a long-time fan of John Rosemond, and I read his books about raising children when my oldest was a toddler. I have used his advice with my kids many times over the years. I had been confounded, however, when my oldest hit his teen years, and my always well-behaved, compliant, good student suddenly turned into a grouchy, argumentative kid who seemed to try his hardest to NOT do what we wanted him to do, and his grades hit the skids. I was reminded of Dr. Rosemond by my SIL, and I saw this book. I started reading it, and I was SURE Dr. Rosemond had been living in my house when he wrote it! It sounded just like us! Anyway, I finished reading the book, and I am now applying the advice he gave to my interactions with my son (he is 15). I wish I had read this when he was 12, it would have definitely saved us a lot of headaches, heartaches, and hassles. My husband and I have now stepped completely out of the homework/grades hassle, and put the problem squarely where it belongs, back on our son. We told him the problem was his to solve, and either he will or he won't, but we are not going to participate in the solution anymore. Miraculously, with the 3 weeks he had left in his last grading period, he pulled his two "problem" grades up to acceptable levels, without any further intervention (or nagging!) from us. I have already recommended this book to several of my friends with teens and pre-teens.

Very helpful!!

Live by this!

one of the best parental books out there period.